Alone in Her Dreams:
A Poem Of love Unknown
A Poem Of love Unknown
Silently she sleeps alone in her dreams,
is it here I exist or am I a myth?
Illusions are real as I lay by her side
yet tonight I felt lost, those fires have died.
The room where we loved no longer feels warm,
our once flowering bed now ravaged by thorns,
my head lays in nettles my limbs upon weeds
and still she sleeps alone in her dreams.
I watch her breathe, she murmurs she moans,
there are two in this bed but one is alone.
Her mind is her secret kept hidden from me,
her words are like legends in stories she weaves,
but words are not spoken when love is not real,
truths are kept secret and never revealed.
A tear gently forms to run down my cheek
yet still she sleeps alone in her dreams.
*****************************
image courtesy creative commons http://www.flickr.com/photos/sharynmorrow/
44 comments:
awesome,
you are rather speedy in writing a new poem.
lovely image.
One of the most sad things I can think of - being together - but still alone..
And Pete - you have captured this sad feeling so well - the mood and the loneliness..and everything that goes with it..
Claudia
This was wonderful (and sad). It's bad to feel lonely when you are alone; it's a bit worse to feel lonely even when you are not. great portrayal of emotion.
alone in her dreams...sad for both...hey great day today at One Shot Wednesday! we had some amazing talent again!
A sad poem but beautifully done!
this is a great piece and sure most everyone has felt that way at one time or another...you capture that alone feeling well here...bkm
Darken dreams are her dreams
for her to dream and moan
Still the one who is beside her
is the one she left alone
I appreciate that you explore even the harder side of life and relationships in your writing. Well written. - Bill
I loved it even though I found it sad:) You have so much talent and thanks for sharing:)
When the love has died, the hardest place to be can be by their side. Yes. :(
Anothr excellent poem from you.
I hear the passion in the words
Anothr excellent poem from you.
I hear the passion in the words
i don't want to come across as bias but it seems that the feelings you have recorded so beautifully are usually the ones that a woman would say! not that there aren't a terrible amount of guys who go through this...it is incredibly refreshing to hear the pain that a man feels when the love is gone. this is an excellent write, peter!
:) interesting and touching, I love it, emotions that flow within this poem, it is truly amazing, thank for sharing=D
wow...i love the weave of emotions
so true that sometimes you can be right next to someone and not feel or receive any recognition you exist from them...loved how this poem sounds when read aloud and thought it really flowed well. thank you for sharing :)
Dreams -- our hidden world, can sweetly inspire, be frightening, haunting, or "yesterday bit of undigested meat" from scrooge...
In the end it is our own private world.
Beautiful moment even in its loneliness it is still divine.
Joanny
beautiful on every level even with the sad undertone..I admire that he cares enough to wonder..my own husband has become well aware that my other world is what actually keeps me sane in this one!
Oh so nicely written Pete and don't you just hate the unknown love. All those secrets with you wondering what she's thinking or if she ever envisions you..The fires now feel like ice. Very sad but i felt you there.
Wild Rose~
So sad to read, I can feel your lonliness. Nice use of imagery with thorns and roses etc. glad I found you on Jingles Rally!
Nice stuff Pete, great poem. And the Blog's looking flash! Cheers for the visit, too.
Warmest salad
Luke
fantastic.this sound to me like a dramatic monologue. a sad tale of lost love. i specially liked the flow of imagery in this poem.
Hi again Pete!
I'm glad you managed to link up at my blog - and I feel exceedingly honored!
..and I had to read your fantastic poem again - now that I'm already here...
Have a lovely evening!
Claudia
Beautiful poem about love...I hope she draws him into her dreams very soon...I hate to see him cry. Well done. Heartspell
hi to you all and a big thankyou for commenting on this poem...cheers Pete
pete that was beautiful, u are very talented :)
this is sad but well done, together but so far apart, the worst kind of lonliness, wow, you are good!!thanks
alan
Tears! You have ravaged my poor heart, Pete. Oh my, shows you have poemed true. Well structured, well considered, finely tuned. Wonderful. Thank you!
Wow, this is fantastic! "Our once flowering bed now ravaged by thorns" Love it!
So beautifully written, and it is such a sad sentiment you've written about. I really love it.
My favorite line is:
"There are two in this bed but one is alone"
I watch her breathe she murmurs she moans
There are two in this bed but one is alone
Wow, sad, Pete. Good work, though.
Thanks for visiting my site as well.
Cheers mate!
Rhyme on!
Tim Keeton
(Undead)Poet / Wizard / Teller-of-tales
lovely n nice poem go on with the same spirit
I like this one Pete. It is beautifully crafted.
hi all i seemed to have overlooked the wonderful comments on this piece..thanks all Pete
reading this for the third time now...wow back in july - almost a year ago - can't believe how things have changed - a sad but beautiful poem pete. you are good with expressing emotions
layered. after reading several times, first time got caught up in scanning with fingers your neat almost but not quite meter :)
like the others, I read the saddness. . .but then, hidden within, feelings begin. . .
a simplicity. who hasn't lay awake and pondered as the other lays sleeping peaefully? great job, pete!
Monty
nice...thanks for linking in brother...and love to watch he sleep and breathe...
"my head lays in nettles my limbs upon weeds
and still she sleeps alone in her dreams..."
What an image of love's demise!
Excellent work, with perfect meter that never detracts from the subtlety of words and image.
wow!
'our once flowering bed now ravaged by thorns'
got me right in the heart with this line.
love it!
I find this quite sad.
You captured together, but alone beautifully.
Splendid!
Know I've read this one before but how come I didn't comment? Oh well..Pete, a sad take on how love dies, captured the feeling in your lines perfectly. Still living in hope ;)
This left me feeling so sad, Pete. There are moments when we do feel our aloneness and when we question the illusions/myths we create. But hopefully we find the answers with the one we love.
Indeed it is sad, but a beautiful write!
Beautifully written, illustrating the expression of "longing"
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