Wasted
by Pete Marshall
I lay upon a soaking sheet
as bile would spit and curse inside
and hope betrayed in loss fuelled sleep
as young would cry and seek the night
Where acid rose and tore through me
like fists that punched my very heart
that yearned for calm from troubled seas
to take my pain and soothe my fight
The days would merge through darkened gloom
with blinds drawn tight on littered rooms
where sleep would fall for weary heads
and life would stop the living dead
Your body lay so still yet burned
and roared the furnace in my soul
that raged upon my clammy flesh
and forced the sweat to ebb & flow
The chills would shake my tired bones
and light would hurt my aching eyes
where coughs & calls for mother’s love
would bring forth strength to hush their cries
**************
The last 7 days have been hell! Sickness took hold of my household and laid each and everyone of us low. Last night I penned this verse as sickness was all that was on my mind.
I also share this poem with One Shot Wednesday, an amazing platform offered by One Stop Poetry for sharing your work
image courtesy creative commons flickr http://www.flickr.com/photos/bookgrl/
27 comments:
you are able to give even sickness life...brilliant
..can feel the sickness drip from the lines...excellently captured pete - and all the best for you and your fam
You've made the flu virus into an art form Pete, well done! Hope you're all a million times better than you were. Funny that it doesn't matter how ill you are you always put the kids first!
yuck.
hope everyone is feeling better...
helped for an empathetic write though~!
Pete, I hope you all are feeling better today. To have everyone sick at the same time is more than exhausting. Your poem certainly conveys what you've been going through. Best wishes to all of you.
Oh no, Pete. That's awful. I hate when that happens. One person gets it and suddenly it becomes a little game of Russian Roulette...whose going to get it next? Hope it's nothing too terrible though...and I hope you recover quickly! You and your whole household! Meanwhile, you're capturing the feeling well enough for us in words, and that's good it's inspiring you, but seriously man...get better!
(Also, the apostrophe in "troubled seas" is unnecessary)
So sorry your week was hell. You didn't waste it, if this poem is any indication. It's a dance of misery.
Pete, any parent reading that last stanza will be nodding their head and thinking 'yep, been there!' Only one thing worse than your kids being ill and that's your kids being ill when you're ill. Well penned my friend. Hope the gremlins have now left the Marshall household.
Hope you all are better soon, but you certainly managed to turn the illness to account in this poem--the whole thing, especially those last two stanzas, is just excellent, and over rides any one strict meaning.
You have described the whole experience to perfection. At first I thought it was a hangover...I identify with wanting your mother's caring when you feel like this. We go right back to that comfort. Hope you feel better, my friend.
I hope you all are feeling better, the flu seems to take its toll every year. You wrote about it perfectly!
so well written....I pray all are getting well there...the UK winter can be so damp and cold...stay warm, and hydrated.....bkm
Sickness has made its advances here, too. I hope you are well soon.
The poem explains it quite vividly.
So much suffering here..burns holes inside..
nice.
Poor you, Pete. I hope you are all feeling a bit better now. It certainly inspired and fantastic poem.
Pete,
I hear ya on how sickness was your only thought...who would have guessed that in such moments inspiration still thrives...I have a number of poems written from a place of suffering due to health...
I felt it here...grossly sick...Be gentle with your self Pete..regain your strength
A great pice about an evil bug...hope you are all on the mend.... wishing you good health....
Truly don't know how you do it; in the worst adversity you bring forth song, and through it revelation. Nothing seems to daunt the poet of your soul. I admire you and as you know send you wishes for wholeness and health. Gay @beachanny
Good images, storytelling, tight scope.
even in sickness from your sickbed Pete ~ chills ~ hope you're feeling better soon (hugs) Lib @libithina http://t.co/tXpkzwp
I've been sick too and I can still feel every bodily function you've described. I hope you get better!
Miranda<3
Oh boy!! You have portrayed sickness in a poetic fashion!! Now it had better show you some gratitude by taking leave of you and your family soon!
Gosh... what a write, Pete!!
I hope you and all at home get well soon!!! Take care...
Dear Pete
Very vividly captured and powerful write.. I enjoyed it a lot. Thanks.
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/02/whispers-night-along-sea.html
Twitter @VerseEveryDay
ugh! I feel your pain...hope you all are on the mend by now. I was wondering where you have been....
sorry the inspiration for this poem was what it was but it sure sparked a damn good write!
when inspiration hits or whether we're looking to write, there are some off base sources all around us
I like the altered rhymes, they fit prefectly within each stanza
Peace, hp
thank you for stopping by
Thanks for popping by and leaving your comment Pete. Good to meet you - from onestoppoetry link up. I'm your new follower too. Great poetry here - loving this - I could feel the sickness! Hope you get well soon. Seems like rivers of mucus has flown over Face Book these past few months. Every one's tissued up. Shah ,X
truly wasted... every word depicts that feeling...
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